SILLY season is upon us and we all know what that means… yes, it’s time to hang the stockings by the chimney.
I’ve never been sure why stockings are put in place with or without care because I’ve never seen a suited Santa who could even fit down a chimney at a commercial bakery.
And what good is a stocking, anyway?
Mothers like them because they can stick ugly, unwanted stuff in them like clothes, socks and bicycle helmets. They can’t hold a bike, a cartoon of stubbies or even an over-sized check for a LIV Tour player.
Yes, it might be silly season, but in reality it’s been a nonsensical year in golf what with the launch of LIV Golf that has divided many players, administrators and even the golfing public.
To be sure, the world’s leading professional golfers and golf administrators in rival camps will be enjoying a well-earning festive season break.
Most involved at the highest level will reflect on the passing of 2022, take a deep breath and ponder what 2023 will bring.
Of course, it’s about now that they will be putting in their gift requests to that noble gentleman (Santa).
Now this is an area in which Inside Golf is adept and is more than willing to whisper in dear ol’ Santa’s ear with a few suggestions.
Just a few things I would like to see him bring to fruition.
1. For golf’s warring factions, PGA Tour and LIV Golf, to figure out a way to make peace. Let’s see LIV Golf chief Greg Norman and PGA Tour boss Jay Monahan sit around a table and sort out the tension that is ripping the game apart.
2. A little more respect and recognition for Norman. The Shark was the main reason golf prospered in Australia in the 1980s and 1990s. For decades, Norman called for a world tour and now, through LIV Golf, his dream – albeit a small step – is being realized. Let’s not airbrush Norman from golfing history.
3 A letter to Greg Norman from the R&A saying sorry for suggesting he stay away from the 150th Open Championship at St Andrews.
4. A gigantic box of Panadol for PGA Tour commissioner Jay Monahan to curb the headaches and sleepless nights.
5. Some sections of the media like to pillory LIV Golf players and that needs to end.
6. LIV Golf player Patrick Reed and some sections of the media to make peace. That may mean Reed withdrawing his reported $393m lawsuit claiming defamation by a number of media outlets and writers.
7. A time-machine that will allow Phil Mickelson to go back in time and erase words he might like to take back.
8. World ranking points for all professional golfers regardless of what tour they choose to play.
9. An open invitation from the PGA Tour allowing Cameron Smith and other leading LIV players to again play PGA Tour events.
10. LIV Golf invitations in 2023 for Aussies Wade Ormsby and Jed Morgan, who won $4.6m and more than $2m respectively for playing eight events in 2022.
11. And a team invitation for American Pat Perez, who won $12.3m for playing seven LIV events – $10.8m of that sum of money came from the teams’ events.
12. A new calculator for Dustin Johnson who collected more than $40m for playing eight LIV Golf tournaments in 2022.
13. A peace-pipe to allow Sergio Garcia and the DP World Tour to put aside their differences.
14. Ryder Cup selection for the Europeans playing the LIV Golf Invitational Series.
15. A new putter for two-time major winner Collin Morikawa. He had his first winless season of his career in 2022 because he could not find the bottom of the cup. Note: For the first time ever he has added a putting coach to his team.
16. A new tractor for Louis Oosthuizen, who loves farming and said it was one of the reasons he defected to LIV Golf – to play less golf and spend more time on the farm.
17. For former world number one Jason Day to be injury-free and make an occasional trip Down Under to play our major events.
18. Santa, thanks for the early Christmas present that will deliver a LIV Golf event to The Grange Golf Club in Adelaide. Finally, please ensure all the LIV Golf major winners show up in April. We can’t wait!
I don’t expect Santa to achieve all those wishes in one yuletide season, but I’m sure you’ll agree five or six wouldn’t be too much to ask.
Have a wonderful Christmas, a bountiful New Year and good golfing in 2023. I have the feeling it’s not going to be boring.
.